This weekend has been like, completely crazy. The weather has been beyond gorgeous. I had a great visit with my family on Sunday... complete with bbq and heritage books and fresh veggies. I had a perfect dinner with some of M's family on Saturday... complete with brownies and catching up and fruity margaritas.
But the hours between 10 pm on Saturday and 5 am on Sunday were like out of a nightmare. The girl had lied about where she was going, and when we called to check up on her she turned her phone off. The first 5 or so hours consisted of sending her text messages, driving around town waking perfectly innocent people up trying to get any possible information about her whereabouts, tears, and despair. The last 2 hours we filed a missing persons report, then waited until the sheriff brought her home.
Yesterday morning, I truly felt more despondent than I have in years. The whole state of my body was messed up. I was just angry, and sad, and worried, and pessimistic about the future. The only time I can remember feeling this way was during the first month or so after we found out the girl had cancer. I am praying and wishing and hoping that the next 4 months (while she's on restriction) and then the next 3 1/2 years after that (while she's in high school under our roof) will not be as filled with obstacles and problems and traumas as I am anticipating. I truly don't know if I will survive it.
1 comment:
We'll be here to help you through it :)
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