So this morning as I was flipping through the guide on the TV, I saw that Pride & Prejudice was on..... now I own this movie, I bought it the very first day it came out on DVD, but I was compelled to watch it anyway. So as I unpacked yet another box of Christmas decorations, I listened to the familiar text and watched my favorite parts. When almost everything was put away, I sat to watch the ending.... Ahhhh, the best part..... but even after Mr. Darcy whispered those enchanting words..... You have bewitched me body and soul, and I lll, I llllove, I love you..... I was still mesmerized by the TV. Now here was a new happening. When Lizzy is talking to her father about Mr. Darcy, and her father starts to cry when he realizes how much she actually loves him, and he says, "I never thought anyone would be worthy enough to deserve you, but it seems I have been contradicted"..... well, those words caused me to burst into tears. All at once I felt this giant hole in my heart that has never felt that love that only an adoring father can give. I know this void to be the root of many of my problems with my own self worth. I have spent much time trying to accept this void and to appreciate my father and the quiet, stern, uncommunicating love which is all he has to offer me. Then, later, as a gift, I came across these words.....
Naughty or Nice
Thy are my child
It came from the World Prayers Archives, and it touched that spot in my heart and filled it just a little bit.... I do have a father who loves me with an adoring love.... who cried with joy on the day I accepted the proposal of my dearest Mark.... who tearfully rejoiced with me when my children were born.... who watches over me each day and hopes that someday I will realize that indeed I am worthy.... worthy of love.
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