My options...

So, now what? What to do with my days, my evenings, my brain that keeps going back to planning the lessons, the curriculum, the fun... then suddenly stops, aghast at the idea that there will be no more lessons or curriculum or classroom fun. So what are my options?
1. Get a REAL camera and try to start a photography business
2. Substitute
3. Become a foster parent
4. Clean my house a lot
5. Volunteer
6. Start my own little private school for 4-5 year olds here in my house
7. Play Bejeweled Blitz professionally
8. Scrapbook and submit my pages
9. Get a different job
10. Adopt a child
11. Cook and bake and entertain
12. Read more books
13. Write a book
14. Plant flowers and actually take care of them
15. Move away

What do you think? Love, Nancy

Random Gratitude

I'd like to tell you all about how I cried most of the way to work today to continue packing up my room, but since I am working on my attitude, I will think of some things I am grateful for instead.
1. Taco Salad for dinner
2. A car with seats that fold down so I can fit LOADS of stuff into it
3. Chatting and laughing with Cindyanna on the phone
4. Bejeweled Blitz
5. That the dishes are already done
6. Talking to my girl on the phone for a while... She has been out of town for 6 days now and I miss her
7. A supportive husband
8. Cozy slippers
9. a small flicker of excitement about our upcoming trip to Tuolumne County
10. No alarm clock

What are you grateful for? Love, Nancy

90% attitude

So I didn't get the job I had been not so patiently waiting to hear about. And I spent a good amount of time wallowing in self pity. Then, at Mason's graduation the Superintendent gave a little speech and she talked about the quote (which I have heard before, but obviously needed to hear again) that says something like... Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% your attitude and how you deal with it. So I started thinking and praying about what kind of a life I would want to have if I wasn't a teacher. I certainly haven't figured anything out yet, but I am considering a few things and trying to keep my options open and my attitude positive. Even though one door has closed, I am trying to find the right open window to crawl into a new and different life.

I can't believe it!

I still haven't heard about that job. I am totally freaking out. The closer the end of the year gets without me having a job lined up the more REAL the idea of not being able to be a teacher gets. I honestly don't know how much more I can take. I've been a teacher for 12 years now.... 15 if you count my years teaching preschool (and if you've ever taught preschool, you know it is a TOUGH job). I just can't imagine my life without a classroom. I just can't.

4 more days

Well, only four more days of school. People repeatedly ask me about my summer plans, and I've got nothing. I mean, we are going on a couple of trips, but I am not even excited. I want to be, but nothing.
I just finished reading The Other Queen by Phillipa Gregory. It's about Mary, Queen of Scotts. Makes me want to go back and read more about Elizabeth and her riegn. Get the other side of the story again.
I had my 2nd job interview at St. Mary's on Friday. Spent most of the weekend going over and over and over all the things I wish I'd said, done, included in my lesson plan, etc. The only thing I haven't 2nd guessed is my outfit, but who know, maybe it was completely inappropriate, too.
I worked on my report cards today. Got them mostly done, just have to add some details about attendance and writing and counting.
I am off to finish up my memory books tonight. Just adding a few missing pieces from kids who were absent and doing the finishing touches on the covers.
I am worried about being able to scrapbook 40 pages by Thursday for Mason's graduation. I just haven't had the scrapbooking mojo lately. I guess I'm just gonna have to buckle down tomorrow and force it!
Wish me luck!!

Random Details

1. In 14 days and 2 hours this boy (my sweet, charming baby boy) will graduate from high school.
2. Today I packed up the first box of "stuff" from my classroom and was close to tears for about a half hour.
3. I am already working on the May pages in my classroom memory books... which is a miracle. Usually at this time of year I am working on February and panicking.
4. I haven't exercised all week... And it shows in my ability to cope with my life.
5. I still haven't been able to wrap my brain around the idea that there are only 9 days of school left. There is still so much to teach... so many ideas to share... so much fun to have together.
6. This dreary, drizzly June weather we've been having hasn't helped my attitude either.
7. Yesterday we had a picnic at the park and I got rained on several times and walked around with an afro the rest of the day.
8. We've refinanced our house again to help prepare financially for me to be out of work.
9. Mark has decided to watch Friday Night Lights on Netflix and I am super excited to have a show to share with him again.
10. I have a case (yes that's 24!) of Mike's Hard Lemonade in the laundry room... that's gotta cheer me up!